Waiting, waiting just waiting

I sat by the phone with baited breathe. Waiting, waiting, just waiting for the Doctor I saw last week to ring me.  Remember she had promised to ring by this Monday at the very latest.  By lunchtime my patience had gone the way of the 2 dairy milks I had next to.  Lord knows where they all went.  I gave in and rang the surgery.  The receptionist had no idea what I was talking about but left a note on the PC for the Doctor to remember to ring me.  By 4pm I knew it was not going to happen at all.  I then rang the surgery again and said as she is not going to ring me as promised, I need an appointment with her THIS week.   Her reply, (banging head on table as I write this) "sorry but she has more important people to see, so you can see her the last week of October". 
Really, I can, can I??? Considering I have enough pills to last 3 days and have no repeat as she wants to monitor me?  I then asked for her name so I could put in an official complaint as I do not consider a lowly receptionist has the power to decide if I am important or not.  Yes OK I was rather snide but what do you expect after waiting so long for this bloody call.
Funnily enough 'Wendy' (yes she actually gave me her name) suddenly decided that I was important after all and could see the Doctor on Thursday at 10.  Ohh surprise surprise, there are appointments then?  (yes still sarky I know but hey I was on a roll).  She then replied there was no need for me to be like that.  NO REALLY? you think that do you?  I then asked her if she knew what I suffered from to which she replied no.  I then asked how the hell she could determine if I was important enough to be seen or not without knowing what I needed to see the Doctor for.  She went very quiet and sat Thursday at 10 then, goodbye.   Yes after being that rude she actually had the nerve to hang up on me before I had finished.

Now yesterday was not a good day to piss me off.  Not only was I upset as it seems I was fobbed off by yet another doctor with false promises to ring me and tell me what was wrong but I also came out in a cold sore the size of a water melon on my top lip.  (I have now decided lip fillers would not be a good look on me).  I was in agony as had a very bad night, was sat dripping in sweat and the last thing I needed was some jumped up receptionist full of self importance trying to make me feel belittled.  Normally I would have kept my mouth shut and said thank you for allowing me to see the doctor in 7weeks time.  Yesterday she felt the full force of how annoyed and fed up I am and I will be putting in a complaint about her phone attitude.  I also hope I am still in this type of mood come Thursday as I really want to tell the doctor exactly what I think of her fobbing me off as well.  I do not appreciate it.  If she does not know what is wrong just say.  Do not give me false hope and make promises she wont keep.

Perhaps I need to go in a full length black leather coat with boots and a whip. I may get taken seriously then. Go in and crack the whip at her and bark orders.  Who knows, it may help or get me committed lol.

I am now also wondering if she has bothered sending my blue badge form off to the council or not as I should have heard something by now.  I will go mental if she has not bothered. I can see me getting arrested if she has done nothing at all.  I am sure she will look lovely with one of my pink crutches shoved up her arse

Today my lip is so painful and huge.  It looks like I lost a fight with a hornets nest.  My hair is sopping wet with sweat and the pain is everywhere.  At least at the moment I can see though which is always a bonus.
I have read through my blogs and they are all doom and gloom so am going to try and put a happier spin on them or if I cant be happy then a humorous spin. (my humour is sarcasm).

Hubby read something I wrote either here or on facebook and got arsey saying I never said it is too much hassle to take your chair.  UUMM yes you did. Many times.  It always if we have to take a chair we will take the one that he has to push.  No thanks.  I much prefer being able to whizz around in my electric chair. It gives me a little freedom and independence.  I then dont have to ask you if we can stop to look at something.  I can just go and do it.  He does not get it

He is always like, if you want something just ask.  Sorry but I am 42 and dont want to have to ask to look at clothes or food or anything else.  I want to be like everyone else and just go and do it.  I suppose he thinks he is being helpful.  He isnt he is actually being controlling. 
I dont want to be looked after.  I want to look after myself.  Well ok, as much as I can. 

I must admit I am starting to get a little worried now about my stairs.  I cant tell hubby as he would ban me from using them but have slipped on them quite a few times lately.  My knees are very sore and my right hip is agony from falling.  Now I know he should know but there is nothing he can do.  We cannot afford a stair lift at all.  Xmas is just around the corner and a stair lift is not a necessity until after that. 
Gosh I am totally dreading xmas shopping as have no idea how I am going to manage it.  I have difficulty thinking without being in crowds as well.  The idea of trying to buy that many presents with all those people around is frightening.  I am hoping to do alot of it online as cannot do it any other way.

I am also worried that people will be disappointed this year as they will not be getting anywhere near what they normally do.  I just cannot do it financially anymore.  It costs too much. 

Jeez another short update that seems to have gone on and on and on. Right I had better go and take my pills before I forget yet again